Your fans didn’t even attend your school!!!
Ok this one is my personal favorite. It is most common when smaller schools lose to bigger schools and then when confronted by said fans of the bigger school, yell at them for not being former students. In other words, the loser makes fun of the winner for having fans.
Here is the thing – college football is big. Like…really fucking big. So (gasp!) people all over the country are going to be entertained and downright hypnotized on Saturdays by big time college football. And God bless them! God Bless America! And as sports fans, you have the right to cheer on the local(ish) team of your choosing – alumni or not. So Mr. Winner, when you hear this pitiful bait thrown your way, calmly point to the scoreboard and say “we just kicked your ass. We We We We We.” Be sure to really emphasize the “We’s”…that’ll really piss them off. But you’re a winning fan, so go right ahead.
About Brad Epstein