— Wisconsin on BTN (@WisconsinOnBTN) March 31, 2015
Who knew that an innocuous question on whether Frank Kaminsky is currently the fourth-best FIFA player on the Wisconsin basketball team could lead to such a poignant response.
This is either performance art, a simultaneous meltdown or a Marx Brothers routine. Everything that Sam Dekker, Josh Gasser, Nigel Hayes and Kaminsky say is pretty easy to follow until Super Smash Bros is introduced at which point everything goes bonkers.
“All we care about is our suckoffs.”
Having talked with someone who knows Super Smash Bros terminology, I can confirm that “suckoffs” is not a phrase that is used to describe any move or action in the game itself. The mystery of Wisconsin basketball’s FIFA and Super Smash Bros rankings will forever remain a mystery.