In this corner, weighing in at 137 lbs and wearing the blue trunks, from Milwaukee Wisconsin, the man they call The Commish:
BUD SELIG!
And in this corner, wearing the red trunks, from St. Louis Missouri (South Africa section), weighing in at god knows how may pounds, The King of Beers:
BUDWEISER!
Gentlemen, we want a good clean fight, now touch lawyers and come out fighting.
DING, DING, DING
Here’s how it all went down:
- Pre-Fight: Budweiser has been sponsoring MLB for over 30 years, everyone thought they were the best of friends.
- Round 1: In April Budweiser & MLB sign a letter of agreement to extend the sponsorship at an estimated $40-50 Million a year
- Round 2: In May Bud Light announces a six-year, $1.2 Billion dollar NFL sponsorship
- Round 3: On May 27th Bud Selig, realizing based on that deal he can only afford Nine Million beers at the next Brewers game he attends while Roger Goodell will be enjoying Twenty-nine million beers at his NFL stadium of choice, sent a demand to Budweiser for a significantly higher annual fee
- Round 4: Budweiser slowly put their beer down on the bar, quietly said “excuse me, did you just say something to me” and the two spent all summer circling one another in the center of the ring
- Round 5: In October MLB decided the Bernard Hopkins strategy wasn’t working and started took the offensive with a flurry of haymakers and an announcement that they would open the sponsorship to offers from competitor beer companies.
- Round 6: On October 8th Budweiser charged into MLB’s corner between rounds to confront their trainers with a letter to rival companies warning they would vigorously defend their exclusive rights in court.
- Round 7: It’s November and Budweiser continues to take the offensive moving forward with a planned lawsuit while MLB attempts to get into a clinch with the classic “we will not comment on pending litigation” defense
It’s too soon to tell but given the stakes this one could go the full twelve rounds before a decision. There is nothing more important than ball park beer access (you try watching baseball sober if you think you’re tough) so we’ll be watching this one closely. Stay tuned to Cosby Sweaters for more updates as it all unfolds.
You can check the boring version of the recap here
