Charles Barkley guested on a Friday evening edition of the B.S. Report, during which he told all sorts of fun stories to giddy-as-hell host Bill Simmons. One of those stories centered around his days in Philadelphia, where the Round Mound spent the first eight years of his career. Barkley lamented the fact he didn’t have a whole lot of help in Philly, and shared a humorous anecdote to drive the point home:
One of my great coaches is Jimmy Lynam, who I love to death. We’re playing the Celtics in the playoffs, and they walk out with Bird, McHale and Parrish. And I walk out with Shelton Jones and Manute Bol. I said “Coach, look at this here.” He looks at me and says “Good luck!”
Hey, that’s funny. Picture the tallest dude in NBA history, some scrub nobody has ever heard of, and Barkley, going up against the greatest front court in NBA history. Unfortunately, Barkley’s Sixers career appears to have blended together. Let’s break it down:
1. During Barkley’s time in Philly, the Sixers played against the Celtics once in the playoffs. It was 1985, his rookie year. They got smoked in the Eastern Conference Finals, 4-1. It should be noted that this particular incarnation of the Sixers featured a still-in-his-prime Moses Malone (24.6 points, 13.1 rebounds per game) and an over-the-hill-but-still-good Dr. J.
2. Manute Bol did play for the Sixers during Barkley’s time there, but only for two seasons: 1990-91 and 1991-92. Their playoff appearances: second round exit in 1991 (swept the Bucks in the first round, lost to the Bulls in the second), and no playoffs in 1992.
3. Who the eff is Shelton Jones? Glad you asked! Shelton Jones played one season in the NBA, the 1988-89 season. Not only that, he played for three teams in that lone season. Even crazier: he latched onto the Sixers with a pair of 10-day contracts, and wound up starting 34 games. He also finished 4th in the 1989 Slam Dunk Contest. He was selected in the 1989 expansion draft by the Timberwolves, got waived and never played in the NBA again. (Keep in mind, the NBA added four teams over the course of the 1988-89 and 1989-90 seasons, and Jones couldn’t crack a roster in a suddenly very diluted league. That is one bizarre “career”.)
It doesn’t take a math major to figure out the holes in Barkley’s story. He mentioned Bol and Jones playing in a playoff game against the Celtics. Clearly, that never happened. Even if Barkley meant to say it was a regular season game, it doesn’t add up, as Jones was out of the league by the time Bol got to Philly. Not only that, Shelton Jones never even played against Larry Bird. Not once. Bird missed all but the first six games of the 1988-89 season, and his only game against the Sixers was on November 5th, 1988. Jones was still warming the bench for the San Antonio Spurs and didn’t play his first NBA minute until November 8th.
That being said, I have no doubt that there were moments during Lynam’s 4-plus seasons as head coach where he trotted out Barkley and a scrub or two against Bird, Parrish and McHale, and said “good luck” (really, what else is there to say?). It just didn’t go down the way Barkley described it.
