The Danbury Whalers of the Federal Hockey League (FHL) are offering some ridiculous prizes if the Jacksonville Jaguars, historic 28-point underdogs, manage to defeat Peyton Manning’s juggernaut Denver Broncos.

If you haven’t heard of the Whalers, that’s totally okay, considering they’ve existed for three years and play in a minor league hockey league with four total teams. They’re so good, that “on March 22, 2013, the Whalers won their first FHL Commissioner’s Cup Title by sweeping the Dayton Demonz in front of a home standing-room only crowd of 3,116 fans.” Note the part where it said ‘standing-room only crowd of 3,116 fans.’

Regardless of the overall comical nature of this league (or their 1999-esque websites), the prizes offered for what we can only assume will be an act of god, aliens, or overwhelming match fixing are pretty sweet.

So if the Jaguars win, one lucky fan will win their choice of the following:

  • 2 tickets to the 2013-14 Super Bowl at MetLife Stadium in New Jersey
  • 2 tickets to one game of the 2013-14 Stanley Cup Final
  • 2 season tickets for the 2014 season to either the New York Yankees or Boston Red Sox
  • 2 season tickets for the 2014 season to either the New York Giants, New England Patriots, or New York Jets
  • 2 tickets to every 2013-14 NHL Playoff game to either the New York Rangers, Boston Bruins, New York Islanders, or New Jersey Devils

Though great prizes, at this point, you may have better luck winning the lottery than the Jaguars winning, much less scoring six points in this game. There’s also a higher likelihood of our galaxy being sucked into a black hole as long as Blaine Gabbert is quarterback. We did the math.

The Whalers are most likely hoping that the Jags get crushed, though, for either of these prizes probably costs more than the entire league has made in revenue over its three year existence.