Pat from It's Pat The Movie

DISCLAIMER: Do not try anything in this article without first discussing it with your doctor. Even if your doctor says it is ok, you should only pursue such experiment(s) under the direct supervision of a medical professional. Cosby Sweaters and its related parties and affiliates expressly disclaim responsibility for any adverse effects that may result from the use or application of the information in the contained article. This is for informational purposes only.

For all you “guys” out there, this one is for you. Do you find yourself with too many girl “friends”? Do your pheromones cause women to come up to you and ask where you bought your Chanel No. 5? Are you thirty years old and still waiting for your balls to drop? If you answered “yes” to any of these questions you’re probably contemplating your existence. Don’t worry, we’ll help you change all that. Read on to learn how.I’ve started reading The 4-Hour Body by Timothy Ferris. He’s the guy that wrote the 4-Hour Workweek. In the 4-Hour Body (4HB), Tim dedicates a couple chapters to the impact of testosterone levels and its affects on libido and sex drive. Without going into the science of it all (you can read far more detailed information in the book) it is extremely common that testosterone levels in men are well below what they should be. This could explain why you are developing a slight resemblance to Pat from It’s Pat—that and your lactating tits. Before I give you the magic formula for turning into a man that will stop crying during sex and remove iVillage.com from your start page, it is important you get a comprehensive blood test (panel) so you can measure the effectiveness and progress of everything you do. I have also included places online where you can purchase these ingredients at the end of the post. And now the super libido enhancing, sex drive elevating magic formula:

Fermented cod liver oil and vitamin-rich butter fat — 2 capsules when you wake up and 2 capsules when you go to bed

Vitamin D3 — 3,000-5,000 IU upon waking and before bed (6,000-10,000 IU per day), until you reach blood levels of 55 ng/mL

Short ice baths and/or cold showers — 10 minutes each, once when you wake up and once right before bed

Brazil nuts (optional)* — 3 nuts when you wake up and 3 nuts when you go to bed *(the Brazil nuts are only important if you are deficient in selenium so get a blood test to find out.)

For more cool experiments like this, go buy The 4-Hour Body by Timothy Ferriss – Amazon (Book). Kindle-Edition. Barnes & Noble (Book). NOOK-Edition.

Blue Ice™ Butter Oil/Fermented Cod Liver Oil Blend – Amazon

Carlson Super 1000mg Cod Liver Oil – Amazon

Vitamin-Rich Butter Fat: Kerrygold Irish Butter – Amazon

Vitamin D3 (NOW Liquid Vitamin D3) – Amazon

Good luck and let us know how much more tail you’re pulling.