Wednesday, it was announced that the Cheez-It Bowl would now be known as the Pop-Tarts Bowl.
That makes it the latest in a long line of college football bowl games named for a snack item that can then be used in the celebratory “dunking” of the winning coach after the game.
While it’s hard to imagine any bowl game will be able to top Duke’s Mayo Bowl, which is centered around coaches and fans consuming disgusting amounts of mayonnaise, it stands to reason that we can expect the winning coach to be doused in Pop-Tarts next year after winning the hard-fought game.
Looks like @CoachJayArnold is living the dream. #MayoBowl pic.twitter.com/4lPFhRYyQn
— Awful Announcing (@awfulannouncing) December 30, 2022
It also got us thinking. What’s next after the Pop-Tarts Bowl? Especially now that no one will get covered in Cheez-Its again after a win. What other snack items deserve to sponsor a bowl game so we can watch people get smothered in them afterward?
The Cheez-it Bowl winning coach got Cheez-its dumped on his head #CheezItBowl pic.twitter.com/Ku6nUkBogz
— Rick Khanna (@rickkhanna) December 30, 2022
Doritos
Kinda wild that we haven’t had a Doritos Bowl at this point, especially given how the Fiesta Bowl used to be played “for all the Tostitos.” You’re telling me you wouldn’t want to see Nick Saban get doused in Cool Ranch Doritos? C’mon!
Flamin’ Hot Cheetos
Along the same lines, the winning coach has to devour a bag full of Flamin’ Hot Cheetos and if they can’t make it all the way through, they have to forfeit the game.
Combos
What if the winning coach had to lather themselves up and stuff themselves into a giant pretzel bite with a hole in the middle? That’s something you’d stick around to watch, right?
Frank Solich getting the traditional French fry bath, as one does in Idaho. #PotatoBowl pic.twitter.com/0pCy7rjM6N
— Hustle Belt (@HustleBelt) January 3, 2020
Skittles
There’s something that would be so satisfying about watching a coach stand under a vat of Skittles lentils (that’s what they’re called) as the bottom is opened up and thousands of lentils come pouring down on them. Taste the rainbow!
Hot Pockets
This could go either way. You could throw a bunch of lukewarm Hot Pockets directly at the winning coach. Conversely, you could make a giant Hot Pocket and then stuff the winning coach into it before spinning them in a novelty-sized microwave. We’re just spitballing here…
