In case you haven’t been following the Jay Cutler MVP talk, let me catch you up.

First, Brandon Marshall told Hall of Famer Michael Irvin that Jay Cutler could be the MVP this season:

I don’t think anybody would believe it. I don’t know why they wouldn’t believe it. [But] this is a different person. I don’t know this guy. I don’t know this new Jay Cutler. Maybe his new name is like Joshua or something. This is a totally different guy. Just call him Joshua Cutler. That’s what the ‘J’ stands for.”

And:

I think with coach Trestman and [offensive coordinator Aaron] Kromer and our offense. … our offensive linemen are studs. They work together. We have a special group at the skill positions like Matt Forte, Alshon [Jeffery], Martellus [Bennett] and Q [Marquess Wilson]. I think absolutely [Cutler could win MVP].”

Everyone decided to run with it.

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Because if there’s one thing most people hate, it’s Jay Cutler. And, if there’s one thing most people never want to see, it’s Jay Cutler winning MVP.

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Then, Herm Edwards had a very serious discussion about it. He thinks it’s possible.

It’s not though, and that’s coming from the biggest Cutler fan out there.

One thing you should know about Brandon Marshall: he likes to talk. After all, this is the same guy that brought a Christmas tree to a press conference so that he could use it as a metaphor for the Bears’ season.

Brandon Marshall loves Jay Cutler more than I do. He’s going to exaggerate how good his quarterback is because what else is he going to say? It’s training camp. Everyone thinks that their team is going to the Super Bowl and that their teammates are going to win MVP.

But Jay Cutler is not going to win MVP because some dudes named Peyton Manning, Drew Brees, and Aaron Rodgers exist. He’s not going to win MVP because he’s going to be spending a considerable amount of time handing the ball off to the very underrated Matt Forte. He’s not going to win MVP, because, despite my irrational love towards him, he’s still Jay Cutler and is going to make a few extremely risky/stupid decisions every game. That’s what makes him Jay Cutler.

You know that scene in “Good Will Hunting,” where Robin Williams is telling Matt Damon about how his wife used to fart in her sleep? Where Williams tells Damon about how the imperfections are the best part about love? That right there is my love for Jay Cutler.

And I love him. I really do. That’s not an exaggeration or an overstatement. I actually love Jay Cutler more than almost anything in this world. I love the way he throws a football, I love the way he doesn’t care, I love his new car, I love his mad jokes. I could keep going. I’m actually wearing a shirt right now that has his face on it.

But you know it’s the offseason when Jay Cutler is being discussed as an MVP candidate. It’s not going to happen. Even his biggest fan can admit that. So, please, let’s just stop talking about it. He’s just not good enough to be the league’s best player.

And, you know what? That’s fine by me. Because, he’s not the league’s quarterback — he’s my quarterback.

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About Sean Wagner-McGough