Newsflash: LeBron James is a freak. Monday night against the lowly Utah Jazz, LeBron went for 30 points, 9 rebounds and 9 assists — on 75% shooting. Seventy-five percent shooting. Only five players have put up that stat line since 1985. Of course, it helps when most of your shots come at the rim — six of which ended in dunks — and the part where you’re playing against a team in full-on tank mode. But, perhaps the most impressive dunk of the night was one that didn’t count.
Late in the first half of Miami’s 117-94 win over the Jazz, Mario Chalmers tossed an alley-oop in the general vicinity of LeBron, who then proceeded to do the following things in mid-air: catch the ball, check his watch, realize a foul had already been called on Trey Burke, check his bank account, dunk the ball so ferociously that it caromed off Burke’s head, buy a Secret Santa gift through Amazon, scowl at the referee for calling the foul, check his e-mail for shipping confirmation.