Gordito’s, a self-described “healthy Mexican food” spot in Seattle, has a photo gallery of customers’ newborn babies lying next to their absurdly large Burrito Grande (aka, the Baby Burrito). Look, Gordito’s can flaunt their “healthy” cooking methods all they want — no trans fat, grilled meat, no chicken stock, fresh everything — but it still adds up to a prepared food item the size of a human. Sounds really healthy to us.
Full disclosure: as a Seattleite, I’ve spent my fair share of time in Gordito’s over the years. If downing an entire Grande Burrito in one sitting doesn’t kill you, the ranchera music blaring through the shitty PA system (cranked to 11, of course) just might — or, at the very least, make you go deaf. It’s actually why I stopped eating there. It’s that unbearable.