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Rabbit Punches: 12 Days of NFL Christmas

A Rabbit Punch has two meanings, both of which describe the nature of the article. 1. A series of fast punches. 2. An illegal punch to the back of the head between the skull and the first vertebrate that can cause permanent damage to the nerves or death. However seeing as it is Christmas, this week’s RP pays homage to the NFL and the twelve nights of Christmas.

On the week before Christmas pro football gave to me:

12 Playoffs Coming (Twelve playoffs spots need to be filled. Green Bay, San Francisco, Atlanta Seattle,  New England, Baltimore, Cincinnati, Houston, Indianapolis, and Denver are all in).

11 Chargers Charging (The San Diego Chargers sacked Greg McElroy 11 times)

A new Lord of Leaping (Calvin Johnson, with one game left in the regular season,  has already broken Jerry Rice’s single season receiving yards record of 1,848).

9 Discount Dances (Including field goals, the Green Bay Packers scored 9 times in a rout of the Titans. With that many scores and the Packers on their way back to the playoffs, there are bound to be a few more Packers doing the Discount Double Check Dance).

8 Maids a Milking (this one is a stretch but lets try some free association. Milk, babies drink milk, rookies are the babies of the NFL, 3 rookie quarter backs are leading their teams to the playoffs, and I do not have a connection for 8).

7 Vons a Milling (Von Miller broke the Denver Bronco’s single season sack record with 17.5 sacks already this season).

6 Goose eggs laying (Tony Romo is playing just good enough for his team not to make the playoffs-egg, the Steelers miss the playoffs-egg, Arizona has lost 9 of their last 10-egg, San Francisco 49ers got thumped by the Seahawks while trying to secure home field advantage-egg, the Texans controlled Adrian Peterson but lost at home to the Vikings-egg, and the Lions’ season-egg).

5 Golden Boys (The Golden Boy is a term given to someone who can do no wrong. Peyton Manning, Adrian Peterson, Tom Brady, J.J. Watt, and Calvin Johnson qualify)

4 Falling Birds (Andy Reid, Ken Whisenhunt, Ryan Lindley, and Beanie Wells are all birds who’s stock is falling like its 1929).

Free Safeties Hitting (The weekend several commentators expressed how it is becoming impossible to play safety in the NFL. Several legal and perfectly executed plays got flagged).

2 Second Chances (Michael Vick will get his second, second chance in the NFL next week after Nick Foles broke his hand).

and Chuck Pagano at the helm in Indy (Pagano, working his way to a clean bill of health will coach the Indianapolis Colts for week 17 and the playoffs. Pagano is one gift of Christmas the entire league will enjoy).

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you and yours!

 

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