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Movember Week 2: A Visit With the Doctor

  • by Nick Hansen
  • in Featured · Things Other Than Sports
  • — 7 Nov, 2012
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People hate change. Some ladies are especially picky with their man’s scruff. Before I started growing out my stache, I wanted to find out what my female friends thought of mustaches.

 

 

 

 

Here are some of the responses:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wow. Not exactly a ringing endorsement for soup strainers. After a few more days talking with women about upper lip hair, I received only one positive response from a girl my age. I wondered how I was going to make it through the month. I needed some guidance.

So I called up Dr. Aaron Perlut from the American Mustache Institute.

I’m guessing you’re probably wondering, what the heck is the American Mustache Institute?

Well, according to their website the AMI is the “world’s leading facial hair advocacy organization and think tank protecting the rights of, and fighting discrimination against, Mustached Americans by promoting the growth, care, and culture of the lower nose forest.”

This group does a lot of stuff. Every year, they hand out the  ”Robert Goulet Memorial Mustached American of the Year” award to  honor the man who “to the person who is deemed to best representing the sexually dynamic Mustached American lifestyle.” They also support legislation to help mustached men.

They are pushing for the passage of the ‘Stache Act which would allow for a tax break of $250 for mustache maintenance  Evidently, mustached men are good for the economy. Who knew?

Perlut spoke with me for about twenty minutes while he was shopping at Sam’s Club. (Thinking back on it, I’m guessing he probably had about 20 pounds of bacon in his cart.) I told him that I was worried about the “creeper factor.” Perlut said not to be worried. He told me that, “There is no such thing as a bad mustache. Only bad people who do not own, nor operate, mustaches.” (I’m guessing that’s the standard mantra, as it was on the @MustacheTalk twitter account earlier today.)

He continued to give me encouragement in my endeavor to grow a good mustache. “Don’t let the stigma get in the way of who you are,” he said. “It’s in your blood. It’s part of your essence ” He  was right about that. Poppa Hansen has successfully carried out a mustache for forty-four years. I’m sure I could bear it for at least a month.

He mentioned that mustached men have a history of bravery and leadership. The greatest, most manly president of all time did sport quite the ‘stache back in his day. (Maybe that’s what’s missing from Washington?) And as a journalist, I shouldn’t worry about sporting a mustache. There are some fantastic mustached journalists.

My conversation with Perlut was probably the most philosophical I’ve ever gotten about facial hair. It was just what I needed.

After I finished talking with Perlut, I headed to my evening class, while scribbling down notes I overheard a classmate talking about how she once made her husband grow out a Fu-Manchu. A female, who liked mustaches! Finally.

I told her about Movember and that I was growing out my mustache. She reccommend that I try the Fu-Manchu.

The extra length does add some ruggedness to my face. I do have a slight patchiness to my facial hair, so it may take a while to fill in, but I’m in it for the long haul. Oh, and the Fu goes great with my Carhart coat. I love anything that brings out my blue collar roots.

Even though I don’t have the chops going, I sort of feel like this now:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Let it grow.

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Tags: MovemberMustachesThe American Mustache Institue

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