Culture, Featured

Make This For Your Date And Get Laid

Allow me to introduce myself.  My name is Evalicious and I’m currently finishing up my degree at Le Cordon Bleu. Food is my life, and when it comes to giving advice on what to make for a special occasion, or just fun appies at a tailgate, I’m your girl.  My nose is never in the air when it comes to food.  I like junk just the rest of you*, especially after a long night out.  Bottom line – I’m hot, I know how to cook and I can probably drink you under the table.

 

Braised Osso Bucco with Creamy Polenta

Get some!

First things first: what is Osso Bucco? It’s veal shank (aka baby cow) and is honestly the most tender and yummy piece of meat you will put in your mouth* – until my next post, that is. You can buy veal shanks at your local butcher and they should look like a round pale cut with a visible bone in the middle.  By the way, when it’s done cooking the marrow in the middle of that bone will honestly tastes like butter*.  Don’t think it’s gross.  Give it a try at the end*.  If you can’t find veal any SHANK cut will work just as well.

Ok, let’s get started on the veal. This takes the longest to make so start this about 3-4 hours before your hot date.

 

For The OSSO BUCCO

Veal shank- 2 count (or any kind of shank you can find*)

Veal or beef stock (store bought is A OK)

Carrot

Celery

Onion

Thyme

Bay leaf

Peppercorns

Leek

 

Season shanks generously with salt and pepper.

Sear all sides in a hot pot that has a little veg oil on the bottom. Remove shanks when all sides have a nice golden brown color. Set aside in a baking dish.

In the same pot you cooked the meat throw in celery, carrot, and onion-diced any way you want-but try to keep them all the same size. Season with salt and pepper and sauté on medium heat. Cook until onions start looking clear and carrots and celery turn a little tender.

Throw the veggies on top of the shanks, and pour the stock about a half way up the shanks.

If you want to get all fancy-assed you can wrap the thyme, leek, bay, and peppercorns in a cheese cloth and let your date know that’s called a “sachet” (pronounced ” sa-shay”). Either way you go about it, it’s just adding flavor to the stock.  Deal with it.  You don’t have to do this step, the meat will still taste amazing*, trust me.

Cover the baking dish in foil and place in oven for 3 hours at 350 degrees. Check the meat every hour to make sure you have enough stock in there*.  The meat should literally be falling off the bone in the end*.

 

For the POLENTA

Boiling Water

Dried Polenta Mix

It’s like grits, so basically it’s amazing*. The ratio to this is 5:1, meaning one cup of polenta to 5 cups boiling water.

Bring water to boil and gradually pour in the polenta mix until it’s all in the pot. Lower to a simmer and whisk your little heart out. You should be whisking this for about 10 minutes or until it tastes creamy and not gritty*. When finished season with S/P (salt and pepper, dumdums) and a dab of butter.  I like to add a little cheese in there*- Parmesan, cheddar, it’s all good in this*!

Make sure to bring a good red wine (or two…boxes!*) and enjoy. If the night ends well you can thank me, if it doesn’t, welp, you’re hopeless.  Enjoy living in your mother’s basement.

 

HOW TO PLATE (AND SEAL THE DEAL)

Take two clean white plates and place the food neatly yet pleasantly atop them.  Seriously?  I have to teach you how to put food on a plate?

But, seriously, it’s in this order:

– Dollop of polenta

– Shank resting atop polenta

– Minced parsley over everything

 

Eat, and then brush your teeth.  The lovin’ is about to get real.

 

Cheers!

 

 

*That’s what she said