Big Skeezy Challenge 2011 – Week Twenty-Two

BSC 2011 - Week 22

Good morning, campers!  We are fast approaching the halfway point in the Big Skeezy Challenge 2011 and things have certainly had their triumphs and failures so far.  If you’ll recall, last week Big Skeezy ended up on the losing end of the battle, gaining two pounds over a long and otherwisew fruitful Memorial Day weekend, having been to Vegas and then continuing the party back home in Los Angeles.  How would he fare this week?  Has he hit the wall?  Let’s break it down:

Truth be told, after last week’s gain I wasn’t as upset as I should have been.  After all, I did eat and drink my way through two cities in four days.  Still, I was determined to make it right this week.  It seems that now that I’ve turned the corner at 300 I can’t seem to get it back in gear.  It’s not for lack of trying, mind you, as I do work all the time.  It’s what I do to derail that work that screws it all up.  However, my routine as far as the weekend goes hasn’t really changed, which means I must have hit that wall.  It’s like the sound barrier used to be.  “No one will ever go Mach 1,” they said. “The devil lives out there.”  If it’s true and he lives past my own personal sound barrier, I figure it’s time to pay him a visit.

The trick was figuring out how to go about it.  I was already riding roughly seven miles a day on my bike and doing 30-45 minutes of weight work in the morning.  The only way to get around it was to “Fender Bench”.  What’s Fender Benching, you ask?  It’s something from the latest episode of one of my favorite (and all-time best) shows on television, “Friday Night Lights”.  In order to get noticed by scouts so he can get a collegiate scholarship, Luke Cafferty starts training outside of practice with defensive coach Billy Riggins (brother to badass Tim Riggins).  Billy has an unorthodox way of training him.  He has him flipping tires, hitting said tires with a sledgehammer, holding odd weights above his head while stepping on and off the weight bench, etc.  The best part, though, is benching a truck fender – fender benching.  It all comes to a head when Billy’s new housemate (and Luke’s crush) Becky comes outside to talk to him.  Luke is very sweet to her, tells her she looks pretty, etc.  She leaves, Billy smacks him on the head and says, “What was that? ‘Oh you look pretty.’  That’s no way to get her. If you want her, ignore her.  That means there’s only one way to get her – fender bench.”

Needless to say, I had to start fender benching.  I don’t live in Texas so there’s no surplus of yard space, tractor tires or truck fenders hanging around which meant I had to find another way.  I decided to use another football adage – “two-a-days”, which means two practices in a day.  For the better part of last week, I did my ride to the gym in the morning, my weight circuit and then went to work.  After work it was back to the gym for an hour on the treadmill, increasing the elevation by a factor of 1.5 every ten minutes while moving at a pace of 3.5 miles per hour.  It’s not quite a jog, but it’s a very quick walk.  After that, it was back on the bike to take the long way home.

Like all of my weeks (and most of yours, I imagine) it culminated in Friday.  Those of you who have been with me from the beginning know that my weekends tend to get out of hand pretty quickly.  This one wasn’t as epic as most but I certainly had my moments.

The gang and I made our way to Hollywood Park on Friday night to place some money on the ponies.  We were only there for five races but it was time enough to have a few beers, eat a hot dog and ingest some delicious peanuts.  From there we made our way to one of my favorite dive bars, The Tattle Tale Lounge, for some more carousing and karaoke.  At the end of the night I committed a cardinal sin and ate some Jack in the Box.  I didn’t feel too bad about it simply because I was having a good week and all of the advice I’ve gotten thus far says that I need to have a cheat day once a week to shake up the ol’ metabolism.

Saturday morning was spent at the gym getting a solid workout in, combining cardio and more weight work.  I had a tuna salad sandwich afterwards to tide me over until Saturday night.  That night I took a young lady out to another favorite spot of mine and we had dinner.  I opted for the grilled fish tacos.  Like Friday, I once again made my way to the Tattle Tale for some more carousing and some karaoke.  Oh yes, I do love that stuff.  I over-served myself slightly but it wasn’t too bad.

Sunday was spent fairly lazily.  I ate a bit of Chinese food and that was more or less it for the day.  I got a good night’s sleep and awoke early Monday to start fender benching again.  I did a good, long two-a-day yesterday and ate a bit of chicken last night just to sate me until this morning.

Feeling good when I awoke, I climbed out of bed and made my way to the scale.  I stepped on and discovered that…

…I’d lost three pounds.  That brings me down to 295 with a total weight loss on the year of 76 pounds.

It’s not the big drop I was hoping for, which means I still need to work out the fender benching.  I think I have an idea and I’m going to try it this week.  What is it?  I’m not going to tell you.  Tune in next week and see if it worked.  Until then, you kids behave yourselves and if you decide not to, let me know.