I am the new writer here on staff at Cosby Sweaters. They don’t pay me anything worth anything and I’m not sure if I am a fan of their senior leadership or not. I am a very poor writer, I don’t spell-check and have poor grammar. I enjoy brats, Old Style’s (any beer actually), sports, Jack Daniels, females and The Cubs. I will, over the course of this MLB 2011 season, be writing a few times a week on anything I deem relevant in the Cubs realm. I grew up just outside of Chicago, been to Wrigley more times than I can count, and have stuck with the loveable losers for my entire life. I will refer to the Cubs team as “us,” “we,” and “ours.”

This brings us to April 1, 2011. The Cubs are scheduled to open their 2011 campaign against the Shittsburg Pirates. Last year was a struggle (same as 100+ years) as we went just 75-87 to finish 16 games off the pace and no post-season. Enter Mike Quade who replaced Sweet Lou late in the season, and led the Cubs to an impressive 24-13 record. This Spring he has done something most Cubs managers have been afraid to do, went against the grain and followed it up with a big middle finger. I dig it, Silva was fat and lazy. We don’t need that, and most importantly it sent a message to the organization to not go Lendale White during the season. Quade has a pair, that is what the Cubs need. Lou had a pair, but they were sagging a bit too low during his latter years as he waited for retirement.

So what are we looking like this year? We still have our big three: Aramis Ramirez, Alfonso Soriano and Carlos Zambrano, who will need to stay healthy and actually live up to their insanely large contracts. Aramis, please stay healthy. Alfonso, hit the damn ball please. Carlos, use that bon-fire in your big belly to get a damn Cy-Young. D-Lee is gone and replaced by Carlos Pena who hit a massive .196 last season. I’ll dig into the rest of the line-up next week.

On the pitching front we scooped up Matt Garza, who I’m a fan of, to complement the Big Z and Dempster. The 4 and 5 spots are still up for grabs with Randy Wells and Andrew Cashner looking like locks. That isn’t the most intimidating 4 and 5 I have ever seen. Kerry Wood is back in Chicago to help what has been a disastrous middle/late relief and Carlos Marmol will do his best not to throw out his arm in the closer role this year.

I’m sick of writing. Dempster faces Correia this afternoon at 2pm pst. Go get some, Cubs.