The Super Bowl is upon on us so it’s time to bust out the Cosby Sweaters crystal ball and get the straight scoop from the CS staff on picks for whether it will be the Packers or the Steelers hoisting the Lombardi trophy:
The Diplomat – Packers 24 Steelers 17. Aaron Rodgers tears up the Steelers on his way to winning MVP and locking in the cover of Madden 12. He throws for 442 Yards and 3 TD’s. The Steelers struggle with Green Bay’s 5+ DB’s and can’t run the ball because they suck. Big Ben ends up accused of raping a 17 year old girl 2 days after the Super Bowl in a Pittsburgh Chuck-E-Cheese. Troy Polamalu tears his MCL effectively ending his career.
Theo – Steelers 34 – Packers 10. Assuming Ben Roethlisberger doesn’t rape any junior college students before kickoff and is sober enough to take snaps, the Steelers will show their championship prowess and the Packers’ hot streak will finally come to an end. After Mike Tomlin wins his 2nd Super Bowl before the age of 40, former Steelers coach Bill Cowher will act like he’s happy, but secretly lock himself in his basement and throw darts at a picture of Omar Epps that he ripped from a back issue of Jet Magazine.
The Simpleton – Doritos Cool Ranch tortilla chips by 11 over Bud Light beer. [Note – The Simpleton has declared he is offended by the commercialization of The Super Bowl and will be watching the Puppy Bowl instead.]
The Doctor – Steelers 24 – Packers 21. I want the Packers to win. I think the Packers can win. But I don’t think the Packers will win. Bottom line the Steelers are a machine. While the Packers will eventually have a mental lapse the Steelers won’t and when the Packers blink the Steel Curtain will slam shut.
Big Skeezy – Packers, because I prefer cheese to rape.
There you have it, a dead heat. What’s your call, the cheese or the towels?
Either way the ads and the Puppy Bowl are guaranteed to deliver.
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