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¡Go Loko! Stock up now!

According to Cosby Sweaters insiders, the FDA is anticipated to make another draconian move this afternoon. The Food and Drug Administration may be placing a ban on most alcoholic beverages that are spiked with caffeine and other fun things.

For those who like the updated version of the Jack and Coke, we suggest you stock up on these wonders of culinary development now before they are sold out forever. The parent company of the Four Loko has already announced that they are going to remove the caffeine and other energy-inducing substances regardless.

UPDATE:

It has been confirmed that the FDA has sent letters to at least four malt beverage manufacturers, including those of Joose and Four Loko. “The companies have 15 days to inform the FDA what specific steps they’ll take to remedy the violation, or 30 days to provide evidence that the use of caffeine in their drinks is “generally recognized as safe.” (Source)