Sports

5th NFL Sunday

Super Bowl Shuffle

No undefeated teams in the NFL anymore.  The Miami Dolphins of 1972 are definitely hung-over today…

Eagles –  Kolb is definitely the answer, but played decent enough to be a band-aid against the lowly 49ers.  Lesean McCoy is a beast, running for 92 yards with a  broken rib.  No QB controversy as Vick is still the Eagles starter.

49ers – Wow.  5 turnovers and still have yet to win a game?!?1  Heads need to roll, and by heads I mean Alex Smith.  I got pure bliss out of hearing the boo birds and chants of “we want Carr.”  Singletary’s hand slap of Alex Smith sparked a flame inside of Alex for a couple drives.  Maybe someone should have yelled at Alex Smith 5 years ago?  Complete debacle of a season.  Oh yeah, and Brian Westbrook played.

Jaguars – Holy Sh#t, Josh Scobee killed me in Fantasy this week.  Beating one of the league’s worst teams is nothing you should be celebrating.  Giving up 3 TD passes to Ryan Shitzpatrick is something you should be shot over.

Tampa Bay – 3-1?!?!?!  One hell of a game to watch.   Tampa Bay scored 10 points in the final 1:26 to win on the road for the second time this season. The Bucs were just 2-6 on the road last year.  Not sold on the team, overachieving.

Bengals – What a pile of sh*t leader of the team.  Could Carson be having a worse year?  I feel like if you get a Heisman at USC, you are destined to suck or to kill someone.  Heads also need to roll here, too many weapons to be so bad.

Falcons – Solid performance especially featuring the defensive play of the year so far.  Not sold, but definitely a playoff team.

Browns – Pass.  3 turnovers.  Go Cavs!!!

Rams – Complete breakdown by the Rams defense in this game.  The Rams had given up no more than 17 points in each of their first four games of the season.  Just an awful performance.

Lions – CONGRATS!  Broke a 10 game winning streak in solid fashion.  No more hugs for the Lions, I just want to give each of them a reach around.

Kansas City – It is SOOOOOO hard these days to win when you have a QB who is literally a walking corpse.

Colts – On an off day from their fearless leader, the defense stepped up and handed Peyton and the Colts 3rd win of the season.   Fun fact; Adam Vinatieri recorded his 16th career game with at least four made field goals.

Packers – The most confusing team in the NFL this year.  Losing Ryan Grant is beginning to rear its ugly head.  He had the intangibles that Brandon Jackson does not currently possess.  Mason Crosby had a chance to win it in regulation, but his 53-yard field goal hit the left upright with one second to play… FOX audio team deserves a hug for having such great coverage of the sound it made… Real talk.

Redskins – Donovan knows how to win games.  Receiving 5 penalties for first downs never hurts as well.  Back to back wins for the ‘skins.  I have a huge man crush on Torian.

Bears – I had 4-5 Tom Collins’ during one of the worst performances by a QB ever.  Todd Collins successfully forced a long over-due retirement.  Since 1970, only four QBs have thrown four interceptions and averaged two or fewer yards per attempt in a single game.  Read all about it here.

Panthers – Once again, I couldn’t be happier about Jimmy Clausen’s 61 yard and 1 INT performance.  Jimmy, you are going to be replaced by Matt Moore and hopefully you will never play another snap in the NFL.  Use your money wisely, stop buying so many cardigans.

Broncos – The truth is that the Broncos are just not that good.  Riddled with injuries early on and choosing Tebow over a running back are just a couple reasons why this team won’t make the playoffs.  Kyle Orton continues his coming out party (his 2nd).

Ravens – The Ravens outrushed the Broncos 233-39.  Enough said.

Giants – Unfortunately Eli read my last review of him and got some revenge.  Well played all around by the G-Men.  Question is if they can keep this up or not.

Texans – Bi-polar.  Andre 3000 is the lynchpin for this team, if he is not at 100%, they will lose.   Jacoby Jones needs to get healthy and show what he can do.  Time of possession; G-Men (38:51), Texans (21:09)

Saints – Drew Brees needs to get his head out of his ass.  Without Reggie or Pierre Thomas too much focus is on Brees’ shoulders.  Staying healthy is the Saints only option this year.  There is no reason Max Hall should ever win a game in the NFL.

Cardinals – BOOM!

Titans – Chris Johnson is a grown ass man.  Penalties for excessive celebration are AWESOME!

Cowboys – Everyone is talking about the Jason Witten/Marc Colombo celebration penalty… I wont harp on it.  I have 2 quick points I want to get across.  FIRE Wade Phillips and FIRE Jason Garrett.  Thanks. The Cowboys became just the 4th team since 2005 to lose a game despite gaining over 500 yards of total offense and holding the ball for more than 36 minutes. Why?  They turned the ball over 3 times and committed 12 penalties for 133 yards.

Chargers – Oh goodness.  The Chargers absolutely dominated this game in every aspect, except the final score.  Not a good look losing to the Raiders, for anyone… ever…

Raiders – Hilarious.  Defense and special teams handled this one.  Jason Campbell sighting.